Kiss and Tell (1945)

Lt. Lenny Archer: Look, you've got to help me. Can you keep a secret?
Corliss Archer: Cross my heart.
Lt. Lenny Archer: Mildred and I were married this morning.
Corliss Archer: Oh, Lenny! What are Mom and Daddy going to say?
Lt. Lenny Archer: Well, I was going to break it to them tonight, but now with this new row going -
Corliss Archer: Does anybody know? About your being married, I mean?
Lt. Lenny Archer: Not a soul. We drove across the state line to Windham Ferry and dug up a justice of the peace. He and his wife are the only ones who know. Except you.
Corliss Archer: But you're gonna tell Mom and Daddy, aren't you?
Lt. Lenny Archer: I don't know. I'm afraid now her parents might move heaven and earth to have it annulled.
Corliss Archer: Could they?
Lt. Lenny Archer: I guess they could. She lied about her age on the license.
Corliss Archer: Golly. How awful
Lt. Lenny Archer: Awful is right.
Corliss Archer: Gosh. That makes Mildred my sister-in-law, doesn't it?

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Corliss Archer: Dexter, you've got to take an oath in blood not to breathe a word if I tell you the truth.
Dexter Franklin: Okay, I swear -
[hits his head on a tree branch]
Dexter Franklin: Ow!
Corliss Archer: You can take it sitting down.
Dexter Franklin: All right. I swear in blood. Look, here's blood on my chin. I just shaved.
Corliss Archer: Well, in the first place, Mildred and Lenny are married.
Dexter Franklin: What! Married!
[Corliss shushes him]
Dexter Franklin: Holy cow.
Corliss Archer: And in the second place, Mildred's gonna have a baby.
Dexter Franklin: She is?
Corliss Archer: But her parents and my parents don't dream they're married, so of course they can't know she's gonna have a baby. See? I'm the only one who knows.
Dexter Franklin: Well, go on.
Corliss Archer: Well, I've been going with Mildred to see her doctor, Dr. Fabling in the Professional Building.
Dexter Franklin: And then what?
Corliss Archer: And evidently, someone saw me coming out of his office, and must have phoned Mrs. Pringle, and well, she came tearing over here, and now everybody seems to have jumped to the conclusion that I'm going to have the baby.
Dexter Franklin: [laughing] Oh, boy! You *are* in a jam!
Corliss Archer: Well, for a while, everybody thought Jimmy was to blame, and Daddy was just calling the C.O. to have him executed.
Dexter Franklin: Gee, whiz.
Corliss Archer: Yes. Then - then Daddy was just demanding to know who it was, and then you came in, and for some reason, they all seem to think it's you!
Dexter Franklin: What? No wonder your father tried to kill me! Holy cow! I'm a dead duck!
Corliss Archer: Dexter, would you mind not denying it for a little while? I've got to have time to think.

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Lt. Lenny Archer: [after Mr. and Mrs. Archer came home after a fist fight with the Pringles] Now listen, after this you're not to say anything. You've got to swear.
Corliss Archer: I'll take an oath in blood, like we did when we were kids. Will that satisfy you, Lenny?
Lt. Lenny Archer: Well ...
Corliss Archer: You know I never went back on that. And this is Daddy's blood, too!
Lt. Lenny Archer: Okay.
Corliss Archer: I swear in blood by everything that I hold sacred that I will never reveal your secret.
Lt. Lenny Archer: You'd better not, that's all.
Corliss Archer: They could torture me, and I wouldn't tell!

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Kiss and Tell opened at the Biltmore Theater on March 17, 1943 and ran for an incredible 956 performances.
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