Terence Longdon

Terence Longdon

Ted York: Did it win?
Second Ambulance Man: That nag should be going into hospital, not you!
Ted York: I wonder who won the baby stakes?
[Ted get up from the strecher, which collapses on top of the First Ambulance Man]
Ted York: [looking down] Supposing I'd been on it!

Bill Owen

Bill Owen

Sister: It's Matron's round.
Percy Hickson: Mine's a pint!

Hattie Jacques

Hattie Jacques

The Colonel: Come come, Matron. Surely you've seen a temperature taken like this before?
Matron: Yes Colonel. But never with a daffodil!

Terence Longdon

Terence Longdon

[Nurse Dawson approaches Ted with a large tablet]
Ted York: You have given one of these before?
Nurse Stella Dawson: Oh, good gracious, hundreds.
[Hands him a glass of water]
Nurse Stella Dawson: There you are, get it down now.
Nurse Dorothy Denton: [Passing:] Other end, Nurse.
[Nurse Dawson looks ashamed]
Ted York: Never mind. With a face like mine, it's a mistake anyone might make.

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