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Too Many Crooks

Too Many Crooks

Sid: [Billy Gordon has refused to ransom his wife] What are we supposed to do now? Keep her as a pet?


--Sid James (as Sid) in Too Many Crooks

Carry On up the Khyber

Carry On up the Khyber

Sir Sidney Ruff-Diamond: [Watching a game of Polo in India, 1895] Good shot! Well done, Phillip! He'll do well that boy, if he marries well...


--Sid James (as ) in Carry On up the Khyber

Carry On up the Khyber

Carry On up the Khyber

The Khasi of Kalabar: May the benevolence of the god Shivoo bring blessings on your house.
Sir Sidney Ruff-Diamond: And on yours.
The Khasi of Kalabar: And may his wisdom bring success in all your undertakings.
Sir Sidney Ruff-Diamond: And in yours.
The Khasi of Kalabar: And may his radiance light up your life.
Sir Sidney Ruff-Diamond: And up yours.


--Sid James (as ) in Carry On up the Khyber

Carry On Cabby

Carry On Cabby

[after Charlie gives her a fur coat]
Peggy Hawkins: Oh, Charlie! Oh, it's lovely!
Charlie Hawkins: I'll say it is. Genuine mammoth, that is.
Peggy Hawkins: Oh, don't be silly, Charlie.
Charlie Hawkins: Straight up, it said so on the shop window: "Mammoth fur sale."


--Sid James (as ) in Carry On Cabby

Carry On Cabby

Carry On Cabby

[Charlie goes to the Glamcabs office and discovers who "Mrs Glam" really is]
Charlie Hawkins: You! So that's it. Gor blimey. What a mug I've been.
Peggy Hawkins: Charlie, please, I know what you're thinking.
Charlie Hawkins: Good, then it saves telling you, Mrs Glam!


--Sid James (as ) in Carry On Cabby


Carry On Cabby

Carry On Cabby

[Charlie, not knowing that Peggy is running Glamcabs, tells her all about the planned sabotage]
Peggy Hawkins: What you're going to do is wrong, Charlie!
Charlie Hawkins: All right, so it's wrong, Charlie! And I'm a right Charlie!


--Sid James (as ) in Carry On Cabby

Carry On Cabby

Carry On Cabby

[last line - Pintpot has made Charlie swerve and hit a tree. His taxi is undriveable]
Charlie Hawkins: Call me a cab!


--Sid James (as ) in Carry On Cabby

Carry On Cleo

Carry On Cleo

[Of the Britons]
Mark Antony: You know I just don't get these Britons; everytime we get a good punch up going, someone behind the line yells "Teas up!" and they all disappear!
Julius Caesar: "Teas up"? How very odd! It must be one of these strange gods they worship, like this other one they're always talking about, "Crumpet."
Mark Antony: What?
Julius Caesar: "Crum-pet", I don't understand it at all.
Mark Antony: You know something; I don't think these Britons don't want to be conquered.


--Sid James (as ) in Carry On Cleo

Carry On Cleo

Carry On Cleo

[Seeing the capitive Britons rushing into Cleopatra's bedroom on the night she plans to kill Caesar]
Mark Antony: Blimey, she must be selling tickets!


--Sid James (as ) in Carry On Cleo

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