Jerry Warriner: And if you get bored in Oklahoma City, you can always go over to Tulsa for the weekend!

Jerry Warriner: I wish Lucy would go out and get some fun for herself now and again. It would do her good. That's the trouble with most marriages today. People are always imagining things. The road to Reno is paved with suspicions. And the first thing you know, they all end up in a divorce court.

Jerry Warriner: I'm going out to get some popcorn and pink lemonade. I've just seen a three-ring circus.

Jerry Warriner: In a half an hour, we'll no longer be Mr. and Mrs. Funny, isn't it.
Lucy Warriner: Yes, it's funny that everything's the way it is on account of the way you feel.
Jerry Warriner: Huh?
Lucy Warriner: Well, I mean, if you didn't feel that way you do, things wouldn't be the way they are, would they? I mean, things could be the same if things were different.
Jerry Warriner: But things are the way you made them.
Lucy Warriner: Oh, no. No, things are the way you think I made them. I didn't make them that way at all. Things are just the same as they always were, only, you're the same as you were, too, so I guess things will never be the same again.

Jerry Warriner: In the spring, a young man's fancy lightly turns to what he's been thinking about all winter.

Jerry Warriner: Well, have you heard the gag that's going around town lately - "Who was that lady I saw you with?"
Dixie Belle Lee: Oh, you mean, "That's no lady, that's your wife"?

Jerry Warriner: What did you tell him?
Lucy Warriner: I told him the truth, and strange enough, he believed me.

Jerry Warriner: What do we drink to?
Lucy Warriner: Well, let's drink to our future. Here's hoping you and Barbara will be very happy, which I doubt very much.
Jerry Warriner: No, let's drink to your happiness with Buffalo Bill, which doesn't even make sense.

[first lines]
Jerry Warriner: Come on, Haig, get that sun lamp ready.

Lucy Warriner: [Lucy, posing as Jerry's louche sister Lola, has crashed a formal social gathering at the home of the Vances, Jerry's fiancé]
Lucy Warriner: Well, I don't want to be rude, but, ah, may I have a drink.
Mrs. Vance: Certainly.
Lucy Warriner: I had three or four before I got here, but they're beginning to wear off, and you know how that is.