Jim Blandings: That's fine. For the rest of my life, I'll have to get up at 5 in the morning to catch the 6:15 train to get to my office at 8. It doesn't even open until 9, and I never get there until 10!
Muriel Blandings: Well, maybe if you start earlier, you can leave the office earlier.
Jim Blandings: To get home earlier, to get to bed earlier, to get up earlier, I suppose.
Bill Cole: Maybe you can get the railroad to push the train up to 4:15. Then you won't have to go to bed at all.

Jim Blandings: What's with this kissing all of a sudden? I don't like it. Every time he goes out of this house, he shakes my hand and kisses you.
Muriel Blandings: Would you prefer it the other way around?

Gussie: If you ain't eatin' Wham, you ain't eatin' ham.

Muriel Blandings: I refuse to endanger the lives of my children in a house with less than four bathrooms.
Jim Blandings: For 1,300 dollars they can live in a house with three bathrooms and ROUGH IT.

Muriel Blandings: You remember Bunny Funkhouser, dear, that clever young interior decorator that we met at the Collins' cocktail party.
Jim Blandings: You mean that young man with the open-toed sandals? What about him?
Muriel Blandings: Well, you know how long we've said we've got to do something about fixing up this apartment. Well, a couple of weeks ago, he called, and I asked him to come over, and he had some simply wonderful ideas, and I didn't want to bother you with sketches and estimates until I knew whether we could afford it. So I sent them over to Bill.
Jim Blandings: How much?
Muriel Blandings: What's the point in asking how much until you know what you're going to get?
Jim Blandings: I've seen Bunny Funkhouser. I *know* what I'm going to get.

Bill Cole: I kind of felt that he kind of felt that if I kind of told you that you'd know that he knew that you knew... or something.

Bill Cole: It may only be four walls and a couple of nail kegs, but it will always be home to me.

Bill Cole: The next time you're going to do anything or say anything or buy anything, think it over very carefully. When you're sure you're right, forget the whole thing.

Bill Cole: You've been taken to the cleaners, and you don't even know your pants are off.

Betsy Blandings: Ms. Stellwagon has assigned each of us to take a classified ad and write a human-interest theme about it. I found one typical of the disintegration of our present society.
Jim Blandings: I wasn't aware of the fact that our society *was* disintegrating.
Betsy Blandings: I wouldn't expect you to be, Father. Ms. Stellwagon says that middle class people like us are all too prone to overlook...
Jim Blandings: Muriel, I know this is asking a lot, but just one morning I would like to sit down and have breakfast without social significance.
Muriel Blandings: Jim, you really must take more interest in your children's education.
Joan Blandings: Can't squeeze blood from a turnip.