Mickey Borden: I wouldn't win first prize if I were the only entry in the contest.
Ann Lemp: Mathematically speaking, I think you'd stand a fine chance.
Mickey Borden: You think they'd let me win?
Ann Lemp: Who?
Mickey Borden: They.
Ann Lemp: Who?
Mickey Borden: The fates, the destinies, whoever they are that decide what we do or don't get.
Ann Lemp: What do you mean?
Mickey Borden: They've been at me now nearly a quarter of a century. No let-up. First they said, "Let him do without parents. He'll get along." Then they decided, "He doesn't need any education. That's for sissies." Then right at the beginning, they tossed a coin. "Heads he's poor, tails he's rich." So they tossed a coin... with two heads. Then, for a finale, they got together on talent. "Sure," they said, "let him have talent. Not enough to let him do anything on his own, anything good or great. Just enough to let him help other people. It's all he deserves." Well, you put all this together and you get Michael Bolgar.