Duke E. Gifford: How's the picture?
Lt. Larry: Oh, all right I guess, sir... the things those Hollywood guys can do with a submarine.

Cmdr. Steele: [whispering to keep babies from crying] I heard every word you said. I've been trying to keep my nose out of your business, but I can't stand by any longer and watch you make a fool of yourself.
Lt. Mary Stuart: Commander Steele...
Cmdr. Steele: Of course he comes to you when he wants to play. Where do you want him to go? Some other woman? You married him for what he is and then tried to make something else out of him. Well, you couldn't, and you never will. You began to feel sorry for yourself. How long would you love him if he *did* cry on your shoulder? "You don't need me... maybe I shouldn't have let you shut me out." What kind of silly talk is that? And what does *pride* got to do with love? Don't worry, he won't be happy, but what is more important... he won't be back!

Lt. Larry: [finding themselves in the middle of the entire Imperial Japanese fleet] I'll never make fun of another movie as long as I live.

Lt. Mary Stuart: What's the matter cupid? I saw your wire.
'Pop' Perry: Have you been seeing a lot of Bob?
Lt. Mary Stuart: Yes.
'Pop' Perry: Should we level with each other, like always?
Lt. Mary Stuart: Like always.
'Pop' Perry: I think you and Duke belong together. I don't know what's been keeping you apart, but I'd hate to think you were using my kid brother to solve your problem.
Lt. Mary Stuart: Aww Pop, why didn't I meet you first?

[crewmembers struggle to fix leaking hatch]
Sister Anna: Anything I can do to help?
Jonesy: Spit teeth and cuss!
[sees sister Anna]
Jonesy: Sorry sister, didn't see you.
Sister Anna: That's alright, go ahead, I'll spit teeth!