Lou Costello
(as Wilbur Grey)
Chick Young:
[the phone rings] Answer that phone.
[a lady rings the bell for service]
Chick Young: Answer the bell.
[the phone rings again]
Chick Young: Answer the phone!
Wilbur Grey: Which one do you want me to answer first?
Chick Young: Both of them!
Wilbur Grey: [mocks him] Both of them! Both of them!
[a lady rings the bell for service]
Chick Young: Answer the bell.
[the phone rings again]
Chick Young: Answer the phone!
Wilbur Grey: Which one do you want me to answer first?
Chick Young: Both of them!
Wilbur Grey: [mocks him] Both of them! Both of them!
Lou Costello
(as Wilbur Grey)
Chick Young:
Get up on your feet. It's only a dummy
Wilbur: Dummy nothin'. It was smart enough to scare me.
Wilbur: Dummy nothin'. It was smart enough to scare me.
Lou Costello
(as Wilbur Grey)
Chick Young:
I don't get it. Out of all the guys around here that classy dish has to pick out a guy like you.
Wilbur Grey: What's wrong with that?
Chick Young: Go look at yourself in the mirror sometime.
Wilbur Grey: Why should I hurt my own feelings?
Wilbur Grey: What's wrong with that?
Chick Young: Go look at yourself in the mirror sometime.
Wilbur Grey: Why should I hurt my own feelings?
Lou Costello
(as Wilbur Grey)
Chick Young:
I know there's no such person as Dracula. You know there's no such person as Dracula.
Wilbur Grey: But does Dracula know it?
Wilbur Grey: But does Dracula know it?
Lou Costello
(as Wilbur Grey)
Chick Young:
I'm going out to get the other crate. And no back talk!
Wilbur: I've got just two words to say to you.
Chick Young: What is that?
Wilbur: Hurry back.
Wilbur: I've got just two words to say to you.
Chick Young: What is that?
Wilbur: Hurry back.
Lou Costello
(as Wilbur Grey)
Chick Young:
People pay McDougal cash to come in here and get scared.
Wilbur: I'm cheatin' him. I'm gettin' scared for nothin'.
Wilbur: I'm cheatin' him. I'm gettin' scared for nothin'.
Bud Abbott
(as Chick Young)
Bud Abbott
(as Chick Young)
Chick Young:
What I'd like to know is, what does he got they I haven't got?
Dr. Sandra Mornay: A brain.
Wilbur: [flattered] Oh, a brain.
Chick Young: I'd like to know where it is.
Dr. Sandra Mornay: A brain.
Wilbur: [flattered] Oh, a brain.
Chick Young: I'd like to know where it is.
Lon Chaney Jr.
(as Larry Talbot / The Wolf Man)
Chick Young:
Why don't you get down to the police station and tell them you know the story of Dracula and Monster they'd be very interested.
Larry Talbot: I can't do that because then I'd have to tell them who I am and how I know what I know.
Larry Talbot: I can't do that because then I'd have to tell them who I am and how I know what I know.
Lou Costello
(as Wilbur Grey)
Chick Young:
You know the old saying? Everything comes in threes. Now suppose a third girl should fall in love with you?
Wilbur Grey: What's her name?
Chick Young: We'll say her name is Mary.
Wilbur Grey: Is she pretty?
Chick Young: Beautiful!
Wilbur Grey: Naturally, she'd have to be.
Chick Young: Now you have Mary, you have Joan, and you have Sandra. So, to prove to you that I'm your pal, your bosom friend, I'll take one of the girls off your hands.
Wilbur Grey: Chick, you're what I call a real pal... you take Mary.
Wilbur Grey: What's her name?
Chick Young: We'll say her name is Mary.
Wilbur Grey: Is she pretty?
Chick Young: Beautiful!
Wilbur Grey: Naturally, she'd have to be.
Chick Young: Now you have Mary, you have Joan, and you have Sandra. So, to prove to you that I'm your pal, your bosom friend, I'll take one of the girls off your hands.
Wilbur Grey: Chick, you're what I call a real pal... you take Mary.