[Ninotchka is examining a map of Paris]
Leon: Pardon me, are you an explorer?
Ninotchka: No. I'm looking for the Eiffel Tower.
Leon: Good heavens, is that thing lost again? Oh, are you interested in a view?
Ninotchka: I'm interested in the Eiffel Tower from a technical standpoint.
Leon: Technical? No, no, I'm afraid I couldn't be of much help from that angle. You see, a Parisian only goes to the tower in moments of despair to jump off.
Ninotchka: How long does it take a man to land?
Leon: Now isn't that too bad? The last time I jumped, I forgot to time it.


--Melvyn Douglas (as Leon) in Ninotchka

Jim Blandings: That's fine. For the rest of my life, I'll have to get up at 5 in the morning to catch the 6:15 train to get to my office at 8. It doesn't even open until 9, and I never get there until 10!
Muriel Blandings: Well, maybe if you start earlier, you can leave the office earlier.
Jim Blandings: To get home earlier, to get to bed earlier, to get up earlier, I suppose.
Bill Cole: Maybe you can get the railroad to push the train up to 4:15. Then you won't have to go to bed at all.


--Melvyn Douglas (as Bill Cole) in Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House

Bill Cole: I kind of felt that he kind of felt that if I kind of told you that you'd know that he knew that you knew... or something.


--Melvyn Douglas (as Bill Cole) in Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House

Bill Cole: It may only be four walls and a couple of nail kegs, but it will always be home to me.


--Melvyn Douglas (as Bill Cole) in Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House

Bill Cole: The next time you're going to do anything or say anything or buy anything, think it over very carefully. When you're sure you're right, forget the whole thing.


--Melvyn Douglas (as Bill Cole) in Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House

Bill Cole: You've been taken to the cleaners, and you don't even know your pants are off.


--Melvyn Douglas (as Bill Cole) in Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House

Jim Blandings: Look, you can't measure everything on a slide rule. This house has certain intangibles.
Bill Cole: Like what for instance?
Jim Blandings: Like antique value for instance. It just so happens that General, um, Gates stopped right there, that very house, to water his horses.
Bill Cole: I don't care if General Grant stopped in for a scotch and sode. You're still getting rooked.


--Melvyn Douglas (as Bill Cole) in Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House

Jim Blandings: What do you think, Bill? Steal, huh?
Bill Cole: Humm... Steal's an understatement. Swindle might be a little more appropriate.


--Melvyn Douglas (as Bill Cole) in Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House

Bill Cole: Every time you get tight you weep on my shoulder about the advertising business -- how it forces a sensitive soul like yourself to make a living by bamboozling the American public. Well, I would say that a small part of that victimized group has now redressed the balance.


--Melvyn Douglas (as Bill Cole) in Mr. Blandings Builds His Dream House